So I think the excessive napping is probably due to her molars coming in. It must be Tashi's way of dealing with pain--especially since she cries now upon waking more often than not--and sometimes even points to her teeth. The problem is that she napped so briefly at daycare on Friday, and now I'm starting this month of fulltime work, so I'm a little concerned about how she'll make it through the day at daycare. Maybe the longer day means she'll nap twice again...? We'll have to see. We've held off on giving her Tylenol, and sister recommended Motrin. I think we'll wait till it seems like her night sleep is being disrupted, and so far (knock wood) she's still a solid 12-hour sleeper. And she's been eating fine, as usual, too.
Despite the approximately four back teeth coming in (we can't be sure anymore--our only way of telling is when she's laughing or crying, no longer can we stick a finger in and feel around) Tashi rallied for a couple outings this weekend. We went to sister's on Saturday late afternoon to say hello to her in-laws visiting from India. We hadn't seen sister's family since Thanksgiving. Then Sunday was Leo's first birthday party at Soda Bar in Prospect Heights. Yup, it's a bar, but apparently they have Music for Aardvarks classes so it was pretty kid-friendly. We also saw another blog pal there, Luke, who is nearly exactly one year older than Tashi (Nov. 9, 2006). Leo's dad, Luke's dad, and I all worked together in Hong Kong--gee, it must be 10 years ago now, I just realized. Wow! Both days Tashi had only one nap despite us putting her down for two, but she did just fine. Dara, Leo's mom, mentioned that she knew people or at least someone whose kid did two naps till they were 16 months. I mean, I'd do two naps as long as I could, why not?
I'm at my maximum for Vimeo uploading so I can't include part two of this video just yet. I've been wanting to capture how she loves to pry apart pages of books. But every time I get the camera out she loses interest (naturally). Here's part of it, anyway. (And yes, she pretty much wears sleepers all day--at least in the morning till she's done with an attempt at a first nap!)
We celebrated with our friends Sara and Dan (Sammy's parents) and another couple, since we were lucky enough to get our sitter to come over. It was great fun--and within walking distance although we took the subway one stop because of the icy sidewalks and bitterly cold wind. Tashi spent the last day of 2008 by sleeping in till nearly 9am (!) and then taking two monster naps for four hours total, making us wonder about an end-of-year growth spurt.
Here are some recent videos. This first one is from Christmas morning and shows definitively how the ribbon was much more interesting than the gift itself, at least initially. The gift is from husband's now-former boss Ariel--thanks Ariel, the books are great (as you can see from the bottom video)!
This one is from yesterday. I wanted to capture Tashi's fascination with turning pages but she wouldn't let go of the tennis ball. But one thing does get her attention in the book--have a look!
We are spending the first day of the New Year (which is very cold) being lazy, playing with webcams and flashcards and new toys. Sara and Dan have a video baby monitor which we'd never seen in use. It was so cool watching Sammy getting herself to sleep in the crib with her stuffed animal. She'd be on her stomach, then flip over, then sit up, then rotate around, etc etc. Sara said she was completely addicted to watching it. We could see why--it was totally adorable and a huge step up from the sound monitor, which husband and I frequently hold up to our ears in order to try to decipher mystery noises from the crib.
We are at Waipo and Ahgong's for a few days in between holidays. Tashi remembers the house from when we were here last, at Thanksgiving, which is great. Not freaked out by unfamiliar surroundings, she goes right down for bed and naps (although we seem to be rapidly going to a single nap, for real this time, much to my dismay). Our drive down in the fog was pretty laborious, an extra 45 minutes, but once we got here we got to do our usual--laundry for mom, taking advantage of babysitting for dad, and Xiaobai for Tashi.
Tashi was so needing to take her (only) nap when we set out yesterday afternoon. She immediately fell asleep, though the new car seat means her head lolls about rather alarmingly since she is no longer supine. Every time husband had to brake hard, her head would slump forward. I ended up using some cloth diapers (clean of course) to hold her head in place. I thought she'd outgrown the need to wake up when we are going below 60 mph, but she woke up when the traffic got really bad. Then once the sun set she was quiet, and I was hoping she'd fall asleep again. I'd given her a rice cracker--which is fast becoming a Tashi security blanket--and in the dark every now and then we'd hear a little crunch from the back seat.
A few things I wanted to mention: Happy Boxing Day Birthday to husband's cousin Adlai; a shoutout to old Bangkok friend Jefe and Susie who came to visit from California (and with whom Bret and I enjoyed a delicious meal at The Spotted Pig) (see Bret's writeup here); and a note that our Christmas-related photos are in this Flickr set.
Tashi skill-o-meter: When we say agua or water, she'll reach for her sippy cup. Same goes for hat. She understands! Time to stop using curse words.
A short video from Aislinn and Jeffery's potluck party this past weekend. All the kids were born last year and are about Tashi's age (Livia's the oldest--it's obvious which one she is). Another little girl is also half Asian and we kept marveling about how they could be sisters. We all took turns putting the kids in the exersaucer, Tashi hasn't actually used hers in months. But when a means to contain your baby is on hand, why not?
For those who are paying attention, yes, Tashi is in the same outfit in all these recent videos. We did a lot of filming that day! And as I pointed out to Aislinn, after a year of denial I am embracing Tashi in pink.
We got our first Christmas tree as a family! We didn't drive to a farm and cut it down ourselves but did what you normally do in NYC, buy it off a sidewalk from some crunchy-looking Canadians. Despite my expectations, both cat and baby have not been too curious about the tree, although Tashi is, true to form, handing over the stray needles she finds on the floor. We have yet to add ornaments, except for the one at the top, which is an art project from daycare--Tashi as an angel--I mean butterfly.
We have been getting into the holiday spirit with a potluck holiday dinner at Aislinn and Jeffery's Saturday afternoon into evening. Tashi lasted till past 8pm--our own holiday miracle. Husband made chicken fricassee to bring, and we literally walked out of our apartment holding a pot to bring to the potluck. It was just four families with kids all about the same age, so it was barely controlled chaos, but great fun. Then Sunday night was our building party in the lobby, and Tashi also made a brief appearance. There were maybe 15-20 people who came, mainly shareholders, and interestingly (or maybe not) I talked to three other people who had also gotten laid off in the past year, all in different industries. At least I know there will be people around for coffee if I am desperate for human interaction during the day.
The upshot of this busy weekend is that the sniffles that Tashi started Saturday morning with have developed into boogerville. And she won't, of course, let us wipe them off, and nursing her in the a.m. when she's at her stuffiest is very frustrating for her. We've got the vaporizer back out and a new temperature and humidity gauge so it doesn't turn into a rainforest in her room.
Since Tashi started daycare in September, I've been gradually reducing the number of times she gets boob. Before she started, by month nine it had been about five times a day (roughly 6am, 9am, noon, 3pm, 6pm). Right when she started, we went down to four: upon waking, at dropoff at 930am, at pickup at 330pm, and bedtime. When I went back to work, we lost the afternoon one, leaving just three.
Now we're down to two: morning and evening, with occasional exceptions--like when she's very upset for some reason and boob is the only thing that calms her down; sometimes it goes up to 4x/day. But I usually pay for it the next day, because the milk factory thinks that production needs to increase and I get boulder boob--not as bad as in the early months, but lumpy enough.
Tashi needs her calcium and other nutrients from dairy, so besides her favorites, string cheese and yogurt, we've been trying to get her to drink milk. Not much luck so far. In the past few weeks she's tried: regular whole milk, regular 2 percent milk, organic whole milk, vanilla soy whole milk, and now goat whole milk. I've tried giving it to her straight, cold, warm, diluted, in a sippy cup, and in a regular cup. The only time I've seen her actually drink more than a sip--after which she makes a face and looks at it like, what the heck is that? and hands it to me--is when I put a splash of it in her water at Abuela's last weekend. It was more like a milk cocktail. I'm told she'll have it mixed into her powdered cereal at daycare, too. (I can't think of a good segue to Milk, but I've already saved it to my Netflix queue.)
My friend Carol in California, who came up to visit us last week, is the mom of three and said she added sugar to diluted milk and gradually reduced the sugar over time. She said the boob is definitely more sweet and not as thick as regular milk. She also suggested I just go cold turkey and stop with the boob, and Tashi might only drink water for a few days, but eventually she'd take whatever milk we gave her. Then Carol said, Don't start right now though--she'll remember me as the lady who made her mom stop giving her boob! My sister, whom I went out to dinner with on Wednesday to a great little wine bar near Lincoln Center, also said to eliminate a feed, the morning one. Husband'll have to do morning duty more often, or I'll just give in.
A note on the photos: We had lunch today at a new place on 181st Street with my (extremely calm) daddy friend David and his daughter Sophia. Sophia (who looks exactly like her dad, but minus his current beard) was born Oct. 22 but has been walking for a while--since sometime this summer. The girls had fun sitting in the booster chairs.
I've been trying to not make this the all-allergy blog (just like I tried to avoid it becoming the all-sleep-issue blog--ha!), but there are a few things I wanted to mention.
+ Allergist said the fact that Tashi's relatives have some food allergies (that we just learned about) isn't that big a factor. It's more about me and my fall hayfever--that makes any child of mine 'high risk.' (Yes, lots of people get hayfever...)
+ Bret mentioned in his blog about running into Allergic Girl, who blogs about her travails with food allergies. That connected me to this New York magazine article about what it's like to eat out in nice NYC restaurants with food allergies, and how accommodating (or not) the staff will be. The funniest line is from the waiter at one establishment who admitted he was relieved the dinner was over without incident. Bonus: The article was illustrated by Peter Arkle, husband of friend Amy. The two-piece orange painting over Tashi's crib is Peter's work. So is the flying cat in the hallway.
+ The Times reported about a recent study that says children born in the fall are more likely to have asthma (an allergy). The attention-grabbing headline: Scorpios Get More Asthma, but Astrology Isn’t to Blame. Tashi is a Scorpio. Apparently the reason may be that as winter arrives, the fall babies are susceptible to a severe winter virus which puts them at a greater risk for asthma.
+ Andrea (Annabear's mom) got us these great labels from Mabel's Labels, a Canadian company, that announce Tashi's peanut allergy; dishwasher-proof, they're all over her food-storage containers. I just noticed they do cute disposable wristbands for when Tashi is in a new social situation (like a party) where all the parents may not be aware she has a severe allergy. At some point we'll get a Medic Alert bracelet too.
+ And finally, I heart our allergist because he EMAILS. When have you ever been able to communicate with a physician (who is not your own father) by email? (Am trying my best not to abuse it.)
Tashi's BFF Sammy came over yesterday afternoon and chased Tashi around. Sammy's mom Sara and I both think it's so funny Sammy's reaction to Tashi--she really likes her! Maybe it's because Tashi can barely give Sammy the time of day, which is also funny. They're just over two months apart in age.
Sammy's got a pretty terrific, fast crawl with one leg slightly up. Tashi's got a big cloth-diapered butt, as usual. I also took off her leggings once we got home to the hot apartment. Sammy was fearless at tackling the two stairs we have (she has one step in her apartment). They both liked the balloon (miraculously still filled since Tashi's party).
I keep telling Emily, whom I went to visit Wednesday with baby Theo, it goes by so fast. Seeing these two girls chase each other around the apartment is remarkable. When they met early this spring, they could barely sit up.
I was just chatting with Dara about mittens and gloves for babies. I haven't figured out a way to make them stay on Tashi's hands--she immediately pulls them off. I've seen photos of friend's babies with them on--how do they keep them on? Tashi gets upset when even the sleeve of whatever she's wearing--the coat, shirt--is over her fingers. We've resorted to using the plastic cover over the Maclaren to keep her warm, but that's a serious pain to put on and take off all the time. I'm thinking of making it so the gloves are stuffed into her sleeves... but I have a feeling that won't win her over. Meanwhile, I have been hunting for those clasp things that attach the mittens to the sleeve. Need to add it to Tashi's wishlist!
She's really into her hands and fingers. Besides sticking them up her nose, holding onto her tongue, or separating board-book pages, we've noticed lately that, while she still finds every tiny thing on the floor, instead of sticking it right in her mouth she'll hold it out for you to take. She'll even crawl across the room with it in her hand to put it in your hand. She does this at daycare, too. At Waipo's the favorite toy is putting plastic toys into a bin, and taking them out again. Over and over again. Maybe this will mean she'll like cleaning up.
Tashi walk watch: She loves to crawl over to us to scamper up our legs while standing up. This is a little painful for husband because then she likes to pull at his leg hairs. She's getting better at keeping her balance with one hand holding onto something, and was doing a lot of cruising over the weekend at Waipo's. When Hector was over here for Tashi's birthday, I saw him go from a crawl to standing up, just by straightening up his back and his legs. I feel like Tashi wants to do that--her crawls sometimes are with legs more straight... but we'll see.
I'm a bit overdue noting some of the things Tashi likes to do these days. Besides the clucking (so far haven't been able to capture on video) and the spork self-feeding (in video above), she's fascinated with turning pages of her board books and will spend a good amount of time either flipping through them really quickly--resulting in a very abbreviated reading session ("In the great green room there was a... a pair of mittens... good night nobody... noises everywhere")--or in trying to separate two pages stuck together. She's also started cruising a bit, which is holding onto a piece of furniture and making her way down it, and--this was a while ago but I hadn't noted it--in gently lowering herself to the ground after standing. (Very key.)
Husband's art show was this weekend, and the very cold weather Saturday night meant it was a hard-sell for our friends though the event itself was well attended. (And much fancier than we thought--paintings there for sale were in the four figures!) We had a late (for us) dinner afterward at Mamajuana with Chris and Vicky who heroically came to the show all the way from Brooklyn. We had our cat sitter babysit and gave him a decent tip when we realized if you factor in time spent, his taking care of our cat is actually more expensive than taking care of our child.
Today we went back to the show, meeting Abuela and Abuelo there, and also had an impromptu playgroup with Murph and Phil who live with their three kids in the complex the show was in. Stopping by their place was instructional for me in terms of Tashi's peanut allergy--there was a half eaten PB&J sandwich on the table, and trail-mix bars in the kitchen, and I did have to ask the rather paranoid question of whether there could be stray peanuts at all on the floor. Of course there weren't, and I felt sort of silly asking, but if anything other parents are completely understanding about it.
Yesterday after swimming we stopped by Roosevelt Hospital to see Emily and Miles, who had their baby boy Theo early on Friday a.m. (22 hours of labor--I'm so proud of Emily!). He weighed 6 lbs 12 oz. Theo at a day old was so teensy it reminded me again how amazing it is they come into the world so fragile. He's got a good head of hair and latched on like a champ. Emily and Miles were among the first to come visit us at the hospital last year (and they signed up for the whole package--same OB and doula) and a year later, here they were with their own baby.
One of the first things I made plans to do after getting canned from work was to go visit Ginny and Nina. I knew we had a short window of overlapping at-home time between the end of my job, the start of her job, and the holidays. It was super-easy to get down to Brooklyn Heights, an hour door-to-door which is pretty good, in my opinion--that's how long it takes to get to see sister via subway and bus on the Upper East Side! It was great to see Nina (remember--rhymes with China) in person again; the last time was when Ginny came up to visit and Tashi mauled Nina. Now I am pretty sure Nina can give Tashi a run for her money. Baby is strong.
We did a brief walk around the hood, Nina in her monkey hat, one that Tashi tried out in April at Ginny's baby shower.
I also got to be present while Nina tried her first banana. She's clearly interested in food, just hasn't quite gotten the whole eat/swallow thing down. She made the classic 'what the heck?' face for us too.
Andrea asked me a very good question about Tashi's allergies--what's the risk of anaphylaxis with the other commonly highly allergic foods? The allergist said:
I can’t say there is zero risk of anaphylaxis to egg or other legumes. But the odds are 1) low that a reaction will occur, and 2) that if a reaction did occur, it would not be a severe one. So, those are the criteria I would use to say it’s fine to try these foods at home.... With egg, the purpose of the gradual intro is to lower risk. I would not be comfortable with her trying scrambled egg at home this morning. But if/when she demonstrates tolerance of increasing levels of egg, it makes the likelihood of the next level being safe, higher.
What's perplexing about egg is that we definitely gave her scrambled egg after her peanut incident. But supposedly that's the thing about allergies (I'm still waiting for the Dummies book)--she could eat it nine times and be fine, but the 10th could spark a reaction.
And finally: I almost forgot to mention husband's group art show this weekend. If you're in the hood, come to the opening gala Saturday night!
Here's a quartet of recent videos. The first three are very short and from Waipo, who is a little bit of the Lars von Trier school of filmmaking. (Rohan might need his motion-sickness pills.) First, Tashi goes to town on her banana and Cheerio breakfast, and then the next two display how Tashi figured out her limited set of upper and lower teeth solves the problem of getting from place to place with a toy. The last one I shot (I'm also a little Lars): Tashi chases a birthday balloon around the front hallway and kitchen, and figures out how to hold onto it.
(By the way, I want to rave again about Vimeo. They do have a weekly free upload limit, but other than that, it's genius. I just altered the video player size and then updated the stills for each of these and it couldn't be easier.)
Tashi skill-o-meter: Clucking her tongue, a new favorite, and using a spork, a nifty skill also recently acquired by Tashi's blog pal Leo.
This video captures a little bit of the melee that was Tashi's first birthday party. We had about 45 people (8-10 of them shorter than 2 feet tall) in the apartment, so it was pretty crowded, hot, and loud. Tashi was fine at first but then as more people arrived, she started to complain, which made me wonder if she disliked sharing her toys... but I think it was just all the people. At one point she seemed so unhappy I was questioning the wisdom of having a party for her, period, but I guess the flipside is she won't remember either way, good or bad! Andrea mentioned that her and Alex's Annabear didn't much enjoy her first birthday party, either, which made me feel better. It must be the crowds, though lately Tashi's been particularly mom-clingy, to the point where she'll be happily playing or eating or crawling around with Waipo or Daddy, then sees me, and starts to seriously howl. I guess it's like some weird sort of compliment?
For us parents it was fun to have all the kiddies together rambling all over the apartment. The many toys we have (every single one a hand-me-down, mainly from sister) got a workout. I very purposely didn't invite anyone with kids who had to travel from outside our immediate neighborhood, unless they were family (or recently moved from the area). Given the lousy weather we had I'm impressed how many made it. Thank you! (Especially to Tashi's cousins Rohan and Arjun for the birthday video.)
Waipo has been here since Wednesday helping out, thus proving once again that the optimal parent-to-child ratio is at least three to one. Though I managed to make the (panda bearish) cake, both sets of grandparents took care of the rest of the food--bocaditos, pastelitos (both carne and guava), and chunks of pineapple. We also went to our favorite meat market and got a big spread of cheese, soprasetta, and prosciutto, which the birthday girl loved.
Outside the apartment in the hallway we set up parking for strollers, shoes, and umbrellas, and Waipo had the very good idea of having everyone write name tags. Brother was in charge of the coats, we had plenty of beverages, and husband figured out music so Tashi could do her dance. Today, the day after the party, Tashi has seemed like she's trying to recover from all the activity and has been cranky and out of sorts, with a runny nose besides, but she sure enjoyed ripping apart some gift wrapping.
Tashi demonstrated her new dance at the first of two birthday parties we had on her roster today. Frida turned 1 on Oct. 18 but her parents had the party a week later because her dad was traveling. Frida's mom, Caprice, had Donetta from Music Together come and sing and play with the kids, all of whom are less than 2 years old. Tashi's long demonstrated her dancing ability, wiggling along to the music, but today she hauled out a move I hadn't ever seen before--a little salsa-esque shoulder wobble [update: aka a shimmy] that had me nearly in tears laughing. She brought down the house, I kid you not.
Tashi Dance (0:57)
(Husband tried out a new video site, Vimeo, on the advice of several colleagues at work. It doesn't compress as much as YouTube or Flickr do so the resolution is much higher. Looks lots better, no? Makes me want to redo all the old ones... well, maybe just a select few.)
Our second birthday party was for Ollie-chan (standing up in this photo). Ollie's mom, Fumiyo, was due around the same time as me--actually a few days later--but gave birth two weeks early. Ollie's been early with everything since, too--she stood by herself at six months and has been walking for a while (this could be you, too, Quinny!). Ollie (Olivia) is also half Latino; her dad's from Puerto Rico. It was really tempting at both these parties to ask to borrow all the birthday decorations for Tashi's birthday in a couple of weeks. Actually, I admit I did, but I don't think either mom thought I was serious.
Here's a video [updated via Vimeo] husband took last weekend when he took Tashi out for about an hour while I worked. It's yet more evidence of how much she loves the swing. While she was in her green bear jacket today at the place where we always get bagels after swim class, someone said they liked her costume, and I said, actually it's her regular coat.
Tashi's been waking up before 6am which is sort of brutal, but except for one morning I haven't been going in to get her. Husband goes and tries to soothe her back to sleep, but it seems to work less well. This just means that by 8am when she's en route to daycare, she's plenty tired (as is mom--I need that a.m. nap!), and she did in fact manage two naps one day, and not just one long nap. She's also officially pulling herself up onto everything, but not cruising yet, which is when they use furniture to move across the floor--like holding on to a couch and making their way down it. Since she's gone from no pulling up to pulling up all the time in the space of less than a week, husband's convinced she'll be walking by her birthday in two weeks, but I still think she has a little ways to go, based on seeing how other babies have done it. Or, I am in denial.
I hosted what will be our last Friday playgroup and we got only one regular to show up. I think the timing for the playgroup is the problem--4pm is just too late, and if you always run late like I do, 5pm is even later to embark on a playgroup outing. But Christina and her new baby Amina, from Ethiopia, and Kelly and Quinn came by, all from our building. I'll post photos of the three girls soon. (Quinn, who is three months Tashi's junior, is fully pulling herself up already.) This playgroup is one I joined when Tashi was literally just days old. Waipo and had brought Tashi out in the sling, which she promptly fell asleep in. Those were the days.
In work news, I start back a week from Monday. I managed to log on to work email for the first time since January, which was a 25-min process of getting in. Fortunately for me, email if not filed away is auto-deleted after 30 days, so cleaning up my inbox was relatively painless. The first week of November is shaping up to be pretty busy. Besides work, there's this giant election and Tashi's birthday. Speaking of birthdays, it was sister's on Thursday. Happy Birthday, Auntie Joanna!
I've become sort of lazy about editing down video, as this is five minutes long, but at the same time I like it because it's Tashi steadily taking out all the toys in a box and examining them one by one. Cracks me up. It also captures what we think is the first time (at home) she's lifted herself up on her legs (to get at something in the box, naturally). I know a lot of other babies have been doing this a while, but Tashi has been pretty good about getting everything she needs from up on her knees or even her butt.
We had part two of our flu shot yesterday, and Tashi woke up with a runny nose that may or may not be related. Her 11.5-month stats: 21 lbs 3 oz (60th percentile), 29 inches (forgot to check percentile). She gained over a pound in the five weeks since part one of the flu shot, which put her back into the 60s percentile-wise. Last month she was smack dab at 50th. The doctor also showed me how to hold her in order to encourage her to stand more on her legs. Which is something I'm not exactly sure I'm ready for, walking.
Last night we went out for an early birthday celebration for three people from work whose birthdays are Oct. 23--which also happens to be sister's birthday. So sister came out too--yay! Four people with the same birthday (all different years) in one bar, it was kind of remarkable. Unfortunately this meant it was a late night for Abuela and Abuelo who babysat and had taken the bus in from New Jersey. At least I was able to thank them with the men's Citizen watch I won at Dara's fundraising event last week--Abuelo really liked it!
Tashi's been going to daycare for both naps which she sometimes takes, sometimes doesn't, this week. Two quick things about sleep we've noticed that are sure signs she is sleepy. One is that she will be crawling around and then suddenly lie down on the floor on her belly, butt in the air, and start sucking her thumb. She did this a few times for Abuela. The other is that as I'm carrying her toward the crib to put her down, she'll push away from me toward the crib wanting to get into it, and when I lay her in it she immediately flips over and goes for her thumb. I never thought I'd see the day where she was arching her back to get into the crib!
So, we hadn't told anyone, but we started Tashi modeling. Here she is on her first shoot. Oh, and also, we forgot to mention she's standing on her own.
Just kidding! This is a photo Ginny found and sent to me, from an online retailer. It looks just like Tashi, at age maybe 18 to 24 months, doesn't it? Even the ears are the same! I couldn't resist posting it.
Our weekend was pretty mellow. On Saturday just swimming (remembered her suit this time), and then to sister's to see Waipo. Sister and her husband had gone to California for a wedding, so Waipo came up to watch the kids, with nanny Pat's help. Sunday I had work to do, so husband was on full daddy duty, taking her in the a.m., out for a walk in between naps, feeding her, giving her a bath, and reading her books before bed (you know, a typical day for mom when baby is at home). We also went out as a family toward the end of the day to take some photos in the beautiful late-afternoon light along the river.
On Friday another mommy who has an older baby told me that the transition from two to one naps for her took about two months of back and forth. This makes me feel a lot better about how haphazard the nap thing has been. This weekend she went back to two pretty full naps, though on Friday her a.m. nap was 30 minutes at best. Also, I had grand plans of starting her on a fuller daycare day today, to give her two weeks before I start work to ease into it, but at 710am, she was already lying belly-down on the floor, thumb in mouth, a sure sign she's ready for a nap. (She did this a couple times when Aunt Jenny came to visit Friday afternoon, too.) As daycare doesn't open till 8am, I just had her do her first nap at home, as usual. We'll try again tomorrow. I swear she has a sixth sense about this. But it could also be that she is waking before 6am again (545am, 555am, etc). I don't go in to get her till after 6, but I really want to tweak her sked so it's 7 to 630 or 7 instead of 630 to 6.
Tashi food-o-meter: prosciutto, which she loved. Also, actual apple, in small pieces. Very handy having teeth on the top and bottom.
And, today is Ahgong and Cassius!'s birthdays! Happy birthday to both!
Tashi's on a bit of a nap strike--which is how for now I am viewing what may be the transition to one nap. (I'm not ready! I need that a.m. nap!) Today and yesterday she napped only very briefly in the a.m. (45-60 minutes), then got woken up by mean mom to take her to daycare, where she wouldn't do a second afternoon nap. Next week we're supposed to start the longer daycare days anyway, so I guess it'll pan out, but I hate to think that she'll just never nap well again. What happens on weekends is she catches up on sleep (making it hard for us to do anything), but this may also include talking to herself for an hour before finally dozing off.
It used to be putting your hand on her chest or along her cheek helped calm her down to sleep. No more--she actually will push your hand away like it's a dirty sock (though, she sort of likes dirty socks...). She's discovered her tongue recently too--sticks it out for a long time, tries to lick things, and today spent a bit of time trying to grab it while laying down on the changing table (whatever distracts her, I'll take). Tashi's kisses these days mean an open mouth and the use of teeth--but I guess that's not really a kiss anymore, is it?
Last night two surprising things happened: 1) I got carded, though I think everyone did at this bar I went to for Dara's fundraiser; 2) I won one of the door prizes at the fundraiser (after two other names were called out, and those people weren't present). It was great to see Dara and Dan, whose lives with baby Leo I keep up with virtually via Dara's blog. Dan pointed out we met a decade ago in Hong Kong, which is astounding. I saw Dara texting the babysitter only once--not bad!
We might be coming to the end of the a.m. nap. I know I keep saying that, but it's mainly because I'm trying to accept it. The Sleep Lady says the two-into-one nap comes at age 15 months approx, but Tashi at 11 months is skipping the a.m. nap a little too often for it to be an aberration. Often she'll be rubbing her eyes and yawning, and I'll give her the boob and put her down, only to hear her talking to herself for 30, 45, 60 minutes. Sometimes this is because she's pooped. This morning when I finally went back in to check on her, she was sitting up in her sleep sack and saying, Mumm mumm mu-mumm, which husband now says means, I pooped!
By the way, I think I never explicitly said when she started sitting up in the crib--it must've been over the summer, pre-Avalon for sure, but I keep forgetting to note these developments, unlike Dara who's more on top of it. These are other things that have been going on for a while--turning things over and over in her hands (I'd love to get video of that, somehow); lifting herself up and away from the boob when she's done (use that core!); and now--her new favorite thing--crawling with a toy in hand, no matter how big (or loud). Also, the carseat is long become a source of things to play with; the straps, the sunshade, even the big Warning/Advertencia label provides entertainment during drives, like when we went out to Jackson Heights Sunday early evening to see Ben, Eve, and toddler Sophie in their new, wondrously large apartment.
Tashi was home with me today since daycare was closed, and I decided to take her downtown to Columbus Circle (it being Columbus Day) to meet up with Emily and Jen. I felt like I was risking a meltdown because of the lack of an a.m. nap, but it'd been a while since we took the subway and I also had never done it with a stroller. No one helped me, though I also didn't stand around waiting, and Tashi ended up being fine, happily eating cooked sushi and strawberries with me in a highchair. She started to lose it on the way back but I put her on my lap and she calmed down, and then took an afternoon nap of two hours. We ran some errands in the hood and hit the swings briefly before bath, books, and bed. She was out like a light at 630pm as usual.
Riza took me out for an adult night last night, at Per Se, which if I had not been stuck in deadlines and momnesia and a late daycare pickup I would've at least tried to dress better for. Instead the unseasonably (or the new-global-warming-season) warm weather meant an old Old Navy dress, which maybe would've been unremarkably fine except for the fact that in my haste to get downtown after giving Tashi the boob, I put it back on with the straps all twisted, something I did not notice... till I got home. Probably no one noticed, since no one told me! (Thanks, Bret!) It's especially embarrassing as Riza works for a Big Fashion Magazine and I'm just lucky she didn't walk away in horror at my getup that included clogs. (I managed to shower, thanks to Abuela and Abuelo's arrival for babysitting.)
But, like being at a wedding that isn't yours, no one really pays attention to you anyway at such an event, especially when there's famous chefs and Martha Stewart and big food writers in the crowd. And, the food. We were a little worried that we might walk away with a single albeit delectable bite of cheese puff, but then by positioning ourselves nearer to the swinging kitchen door we did get to sample some food by chef Ferran Adrià, whose book party the event was. The minuscule size of the food was inversely proportional to the size of the tome which, if I could lift it out of the bag we got it in, I could confirm it doesn't actually have any recipes. It's a food philosophy book, not a cookbook. Adrià is the Catalan chef who invented foam in food (for better or worse) and the weirdest thing last night was an olive oil bubble. It was a tiny sugared bubble filled with olive oil that pops open in your mouth as the sugar casing melts on your tongue. It's like doing a shot of olive oil--it made me cough. The bubbles (Riza called them bath beads--a better description) were propped up on a tray of gray river rocks and I wasn't the only one who thought for a split-second that the rocks were trompe l'oeil food.
We got the scoop from a waiter that about half the appetizers were Adrià's, half were Per Se chef Thomas Keller's (no slouch either), and we waited and waited for the one Adrià thing we hadn't tried, something beefy served on a bed of grass, but didn't see it go by. The chocolates that came out to signal the end of the event were delicious, too, not least because the waiter had to memorize some 36 different kinds on his tray. I dug the cayenne.
It was husband's birthday Saturday so we had a bit of a birthday bonanza weekend, starting with Friday night: steak on the Upper East Side at a restaurant called Parlor Steakhouse that my friend Ben represents. When faced with the prospect of trying to get a reservation for eight people on Friday night in New York City, I emailed Ben an SOS. He happened to have a client that fit the bill and which managed to seat us at 9pm. It was delicious and great value, especially for steak. We also got a mainly raw seafood "tower" for eight that was sort of insane.
Saturday after swimming (I ran into Tish and family in Central Park--she'd just finished a half marathon!) and Tashi's second nap, we headed out to Abuela's. Abuela had made ropa vieja, husband's favorite dish, and one whose tastiness is directly proportional to how long it takes to make. Tashi crawled around and had her Spanish lesson, but then even with all the distractions needed to crash by her usual 640pm. We put her down in the spare Pack N Play in husband's old room, and she wailed very loudly for about 20 minutes before quieting down--and sleeping through a typically raucous dinner. Aunt Zuni brought the birthday cake, an Argentinian dulce de leche with peach that was impossible to stop eating.
Then we went out and did something we've rarely done since Tashi's arrived--went out to see a movie in Edgewater with Alex, which we used to do a lot. (It's kind of nuts but seeing movies, especially newly released ones, is a hundred times more pleasant in NJ than in NYC.) We saw Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist and all three of us said the main character reminded us of husband! It was cute and funny, and we were a good two decades older than the rest of the audience.
Here's a video husband shot a few weeks ago at sister's house. You'll notice it ends abruptly when the wires become more interesting than the klezmer music. (That's a fake chip she's holding onto at the beginning, too. Part of a large collection of plastic food her cousins have.)
A few years ago Eric (Tish's husband) and I discovered we have very nearly identical taste in music. We went to see the Shins together when I was 9 1/2 months pregnant. We returned to Terminal 5 to see Ben, and I have to say there's a big difference seeing a general admission show when you can stand and move around.
Ben was awesome. His new album, Way to Normal, was just released the day before, but even not knowing the songs the show was fun. The album's like the old Ben Folds, not like the somber, slow (boring) Songs for Silverman album that was probably the last actual album I bought in CD form (and then got irritated by, because it can't be read by this computer--it's double the thickness, with a DVD on the other side). Listening to Ben sing reminded me of working at Us Weekly late on Monday nights (when the magazine closed) with friends Nina and Russell, whose baby Julian is already 6 months old. Nina used to blast Ben Folds from about 9pm on. Tish worked there, too--it's how we all met!
While we were waiting for Ben to come on, Eric was telling me that he downloaded the album but that every single song had a parental advisory on it. Since he listens to music while in the car with Nina Ping, that's a problem. I wonder if Ben himself, who I believe has a kid or two, handles it. Already I know husband and I will have to clean up our language. My sister still likes to tell me that Rohan's first curse words came from me.
I'll have to dig out my Ben Folds songbook and bring it home to play on the piano. At one point he put empty Altoid tins into the piano to alter the sound. Pretty neat! I also kept thinking he must be in great shape playing the piano for two hours every night in a lunge position.
It was only 55 degrees out when I brought Tashi to daycare this a.m., necessitating this furry coat I bought a year ago (!). It was a big hit with the misses at daycare.
I finally got around to looking up 'Biting' in the parenting book Gen gave us--the one that said, Don't worry about tummy time, you're not your baby's trainer! As expected his view on biting was equally sanguine. He said, It's natural for babies to want to bite--they're trying out their teeth. And when they get a reaction out of you when they bite your finger, nipple, toe, it's better than any toy that lights up. No wonder they keep wanting to do it again and again! And it certainly explains why Tashi gets so mischievous-looking before she gnashes on a body part that isn't her own.
His solution is to try not to react, as hard as it may be. Then she'll lose interest and go back to her toys. So I wondered if being removed from the other child and given a talking to is akin to a fun reaction. If it is, she will probably bite again. I forgot to mention, too, that at the bottom of the ouch report is a note saying a copy goes to the director. It's in her file!
We had a nice weekend, with friends visiting and visiting friends. My friend Wendy from San Francisco came up to Inwood Saturday afternoon with her husband David, whom I'd never met. Wendy's a friend of mine from Hong Kong days. She was the CFO of a dotcom I worked at and we used to call her Wendy Spendy. They were very patient with Tashi's increasing crankiness (because she was tired? hungry? bored? Who knows! She needs to start using the signs I'm teaching her!) and we got to catch up on the past few years. David has a sister who lives completely off the grid in a park in Hawaii. Her home is a tarp. I was fascinated, especially when they said there were in fact a few families there. But then the reality is I can't even deal with mosquitoes in NYC, much less in the tropics. Every time I watch Lost, I realize I'd never survive for the mosquitoes and running out of contact lens solution (I'm blind as a bat).
Then on Sunday we went out to see Tish and Eric and Nina Ping in NJ. (I need Tish to send me photos.) We timed the hourlong drive with Tashi's second nap, which was mildly successful, but I can see this trick coming to an end. Especially as she now prefers sleeping on her stomach, and the car seat, obviously, doesn't allow that.
Nina Ping was cute with Tashi Ming--for one thing, calling her by her first and middle name every single time. Nina's so verbal and fast-talking it was like being with a much older child. Tish had me go through two huge bins of mostly pink clothing that Nina's outgrown, which was awesome. I'm starting to make peace with pink. At least the dark and even the hot pinks. I still don't like the pastels so much. Tashi has enough sneakers and socks and jackets now I think to last us through the winter. Yay! (Thank you, Auntie Tish!) Husband was sad, though, because the Mets ended their season. Heartbreaking once again.
After today's daycare, Caprice met me for coffee and walked up the hill and back down again with us to do all my errands (bank, supermarket), wearing Frida all the while. I'm going to start allowing them to feed Tashi daycare snacks, like raisins and other fruit, just because it's hard to keep up. Seriously, at Tashi's age now daycare to me is so worth it just to have someone else patiently feed and then clean everything up.
We had an impromptu playgroup here Wednesday afternoon. Tashi's BFF Sammy came over with her mommy Sara, and as we were trying to encourage her to crawl, my friend Fumiyo rang and said she was nearby. I hadn't seen her in ages--I think June?--so she and Ollie came over.
Now, Ollie's birthday is Oct. 26, and look at her standing up--she's also walking! Has been standing since age 6 months! And Tashi's got I think at least two pounds on her.
It was near impossible getting the three girls to be facing the same direction for a photo. We also had to cut it short a little because Tashi got a grand total of 30 minutes of naptime ALL DAY yesterday. Out like a light at 615pm. (By contrast today--she's home with me so we can go to the daycare mixer at the end of the day--she has slept nearly four hours in naps.)
Since the weather's getting chillier, I got the black fleece Peanut Shell sling out again. It'd been a favorite when Tashi was really little, until she got too big but wasn't yet able to hold up her head. Because it's stretchy, it's working better than the cotton one we have, which had been feeling tight as Tashi gets bigger. I keep meaning to try out a wrap like the ones my friend Caprice has and uses all the time. Caprice said wearing her baby Frida is her secret weapon in her weight-loss contest. Makes sense--lugging around an extra 20 lbs all the time would definitely make a difference.
I saw Tish for dinner last night on the Upper East Side. We went to a wine bar that was really just like a regular Second Avenue bar, but with wine. Meaning, loud and unfortunately smoky (outside). But it was great to see Tish, who commutes two hours daily and during those commutes is telling hourlong stories about witches to entertain Nina (who is 4 and really into witches). She's mining memories of watching Bewitched and retelling episodes--genius! In high school for French class I was required to keep a journal as a different, French-speaking character and had my guy aspire to be a songwriter so the journal entries could just be rough French translations of songs by Crowded House and Howard Jones. (I am dating myself, obviously.)
A note on the photos: The wires one is more treacherous looking than it is, I promise. The white cord comes out instantly (magnetized and attached to daddy's Mac) and the black one we've since covered with a pillow. She loves crawling under the end table and into the bottom part of the exersaucer, probably because there's stuff for her to crawl into and over like that at daycare. And the bottom photo--Tashi as whirligig.
I've been meaning to allude to current events so that--should Tashi ever be able to bring herself to read this--she'll be able to put it in context. Aislinn gave me a good entrypoint. She said, Like the markets, Tashi's naps at daycare will correct themselves. This was before the $7 billion-plus bailout though. The Tashi equivalent to that might be the fact that a caregiver actually sits with her as she's lying down on the crib and pats her back till she falls asleep--much more luxurious than at home!
I've gotten into the habit of ringing sister after dropping Tashi off and on my way back down the hill. She said she'd run out of ways to describe what had been happening in the markets for her job covering them: meltdown, catastrophe, downdraft (a new one for me).
The bailout is being called transformative. Tashi's naps aren't exactly that, but she is seeing an updraft--made it to 45 minutes on Monday.
